No one to hold on to.

well, here i go again being a pussy about my life. well i just cant help it, i feel sooo alone at this age. when other people are talking on the phone with their significant other im jst at home watching tv lettin my life pass, sometimes i wish so hard that my one and only would see me somewhere and start talking to me. im so sick of crushing on guys that i cant have, they like pussy, and i cant seem to accept it, i guess im attracted to things or should i guy people that i cant have. when ever i see people out there in the world holding hands with their loved ones, huggin them, kissing them, expressing their love for one another, it just makes me even more sad to know that i cant experience what they are experiencing. i wish i could have someone to hold on to, someone that i can go out with, someone that i can spend my nights talking on the phone with, someone who i keep thinking about soo much that my grades start to fall, (lol) i might sound like im overreacting, or that im like desperate to have someone, but i personally dont think im none of those things.. i wanna love someone for who they are, and i want them to love me back. where i live, i jst cant seem to find HIM, yes theres some guys that are interested in me, but im not interested in them whatsoever, and i dont wanna be leading them on to something that will never be there. i want to be the one gettin lead on by someone else, i want to be the one that someone makes a move on, but ive been waiting for that to happen these four years in high school, but nothing, and nobody has comed my way. time keepsgoing by and i keep being by myself. i want to be able to say "i have a BF" or "that was my ex" but thats just not the case right now. hopefully i will be able to find my one and only in the near future, or maybe HE will be the first one to find me, but i just hope that that "near future" isnt years away. im tired of this life already, i want a change, SOMEONE to fill that empty space next to me.